Your smile and laugh have changed, my brain biofeedback trainer told me today. They’re real, she said. It’s true, I’m not faking emotions nearly as much or using my intellect to boost them to normal levels like I used to have to. She’s known me since 2005, and I’ve gradually been able to laugh more…
Tag: Personal
Back to Gamma Brainwave Training at PZ-O1
Back to gamma, gamma brainwave training. Back to the PZ-O1 position: the electrode is gelled onto my head at the back of my skull and slightly to the left of midline. That’s the position associated with alleviating PTSD symptoms as I recall. This is what me and my neurodoc were concerned about, and I’m glad…
I am Discharged From Physiotherapy
I am discharged. From physiotherapy. Wow. I can’t believe it. Still sinking in to the old brain that I’m discharged, for real this time. I’ve been discharged before from physio, that was in the year or so after the crash in 2000 and from a different physiotherapist. Those times the insurance company cut me off…
Disconnection Ended Too Soon; PTSD Hell Continues
Well . . . I needed more than a week, technically 10 days, of disconnection. My muscle tension is down, way on down, but I’m still feeling on edge, still being totally overwhelmed by the stupidest thing to the point that my brain goes: nope, not dealing with that now, I’m turning the body around…
Time to Reconnect with Disconnection
I used to disconnect completely from the online world and computers for a week a couple times a year. I unplugged on Sundays for a long time before that and still do. But year in, year out, I used to push myself so hard I’d end up crashing and would also have to take a…
Looking Good After Brain Injury
There’s this thing that I call the ugliness of brain injury. I thought of this today after meeting my Aunt for coffee, whom I hadn’t seen since the ice storm. She was exclaiming over the physical change in me, and all I could say was thank you, I was so overcome. Let’s be honest. After…
The Body Follows the Emotions Into Pain
This week was supposed to be physiotherapy discharge week. But my body made other plans. It thought: why should the emotions have all the fun, why can’t the muscles get in on the pain? Really, body? First the left shoulder knotted up, then the midback (thoracic spine) fired off trigger points like some little boy…
Could Someone Pass the Smelling Salts?
Another regular brain biofeedback session at C4 location (on right side of head, just above and in front of my ear). But not a regular week. My heart rate is slightly elevated from my norm, but it and my HRV (heart rate variability) have stabilized. So even a flip flop doesn’t seem to result in…
My Brain Can Automatically Pilot the Plane
My brain is well trained. I did something I’ve never done before: when my three minutes of brainwave biofeedback training were up, I quit trying to fly the virtual biplane (ok, it’s technically a triplane); then in the second screen I did it again — at the three-minute mark, I stopped trying to throw the…