It's been so long since I've blogged on my brain biofeedback treatments, it almost feels like I'm not doing them. But I am. I continue trucking along, each session a 3-minute assessment, 5-minute HRV screen aka deep breathing in rhythm with heart rate going up and down, three neurofeedback screens of 3 minutes each bowling, maze, sailboats racing on three day-glo seas SMIRB for 5-10 minutes (writing out one’s ruminating thoughts), and 5 minutes of reading philosophy material online.
Since I began laser therapy for my painful muscles injured way back in 2000, my heart rate has droppede, despite continuing high stress. Turns out, that drop could be because the deep, penetrative laser on my neck affects the cerebrospinal fluid, increasing its flow. Better flow = brain working better. (Though why I see the brain effect mostly on my heart rate, I don’t know.) We’re finally seeing the beat rate in the low 100s. Mind you, my GP took it and my blood pressure with his fancy, automatic machine and declared 118 high. I almost choked. When it was in the 120s or 130s, it got little attention, but now it's high?! Doctors are weird.
Seriously though, my GP is a good guy, and he took the time to commiserate with me about the suckage of being diabetic again. He encouraged me to feel that since I normalized my blood sugar once, I could do it again. I am only 3kg away from where I achieved it last time. I suppose. My athletic therapist and other professionals treating me all expressed surprise I was diabetic again because my weight doesn't compute with having type II diabetes (I'm not big enough). It strengthens in my mind that my brain injury is responsible. I may have the gene, but under normal circumstances, I would still need lots more poundage on me to trigger it. And I'm not that bad an eater. My fatigue is my biggest enemy. How can I cook my own meals when I don't have the energy, when my muscles refuse to obey me from central fatigue not fatigue from working hard and activating muscle cells is an act of will so intense there are too many days I just don't have it? How do I remain healthy on prepared foods?
One strategy I'd forgotten (or was so zonked I couldn't even do it) is to add frozen veg to prepared food, frozen or takeout, to bulk it up so that feel satiated.
On the plus side, my appetite has been normalizing after LORETA neurofeedback. It was returning to normal even with gamma enhancement. But I think the LORETA accelerated that process, and spontaneous healing of my appetite is continuing. (After biofeedback treatments are over, spontaneous healing continues, at least it did and is for me. It's like the treatments kickstart a cascading effect of regeneration.)
Anyway, though it should be easy, I don't know how I'll lose such a tiny amount of weight, but with doctors and therapists having faith in me, I feel a tiny glimmer of hope that I will.
